3 Gifts Everyone Wants

Make Any Day Memorable With These Special Gifts

Imagine: 3 gifts that no one will return on December 26th. Or on January 2nd. Or (even) on August 7th.

So these gifts will save you (and your friends) lots of time.

Now these gifts are bit odd.

First, each is priceless. And then they cost nothing. Is that amazing or is that amazing?

Gift #1: ConnectionYellow Gift, in 3 Gifts Everyone Wants, using clip art purchased by Steve Kaye

Everyone wants to feel connected to someone.

> How to Wrap It

Spend time with the special people in your life.

You might, for example, invite them to your home. Or you could ask them to join you for a cup of tea or a walk in the park.

If you phone them, set aside time when you can give full attention to a phone call.

For example, if you use a cell phone, call when you’re alone (instead of while paying for a purchase in a store).

And be fully present when calling. Thus, avoid multi-tasking because this ruins a conversation. That is, if you’re speaking with half a brain, you will sound like a halfwit.

If you visit, engage the person in a friendly conversation. Ask how they’re doing and then listen to their news. Ask questions about the their interests, hobbies, or activities.

And of course, avoid using your visit to offer advice. Instead, if you enjoy advice, you could ask them for advice. And then just listen.

The key to a truly successful connection is: Make the other person the star in your conversation.

If it’s difficult to talk to the person by phone (for example, the person is hearing impaired) then send a handwritten note. Just as in your phone conversation, use a friendly tone, ask questions, and share tidbits of enjoyable news.

Gift #2: UnderstandingRed Gift, in 3 Gifts Everyone Wants, using clip art purchased by Steve Kaye

Everyone wants to feel understood.

> How to Wrap It

Listen for the real message being conveyed by the other person. Thus, pay careful attention to the person’s choice of words, energy, facial expressions, body language, and other clues.

Then respond with some statement that shows you understand what the person is really talking about.

For example, suppose someone is telling you about an illness. This could sound like a complaint. And so some people might respond with encouragement (“Cheer up, you’ll feel better.”), advice (“You should eat bananas.”), or boasts (“You think that’s bad? Let me tell you about my rash.”).

Certainly, none of these responses show understanding. Some of them could even lead to an argument.

For example, advice could receive a reply such as, “But I don’t like bananas.” which degrades to, “So what’s wrong with bananas?” And then the conversation goes downhill.

Instead, show that you understood the person’s real message by saying something like, “You must have suffered” or “You’ve been through a lot of pain” or “You’ve shown a lot of courage.”

Gift #3: ValidationGreen Gift, in 3 Gifts Everyone Wants, using clip art purchased by Steve Kaye

Everyone wants to be right.

> How to Wrap It

If someone is sharing opinions, just listen.

Avoid offering corrections, arguments, or conflicting opinions. Instead, just accept what the person is saying. Then change the subject to something neutral.

Of course, this is easiest with those who share your views and values. Then you can build upon your common interests.

Otherwise, let them talk (especially if you’re at a holiday party with someone you see only at holiday parties).

And if necessary, excuse yourself to find a drink of water or take care of a personal need.

Recognize that everyone thinks their opinions are the truth. And that truth is the absolute, complete, perfect truth – even if they found that “truth” on some crazy web site with a reputation for publishing nonsense.

So respond with neutral words such as, “Amazing” or “Fascinating” or “Wow.”

Or try, “Is that so?”

Or just say nothing.

For example, I was once visiting. After dinner, one of the hosts launched into an hour-long discourse of his views. I sat and listened. If I had tried to argue, I would have ruined the evening. So I just let him talk.

Important Part of Giving Gifts

You benefit, too.

Being good to others – showing compassion, kindness, and respect – helps you feel good about yourself.

In fact, people who help others, become better themselves. It’s the key to success.

So, when you give these gifts, you also reward yourself.

Want More Gift Ideas?

See: Kindness for the Holidays

See: Why Kindness

See: 27 Ways to Be Kind

See: 3 Things to Put on Your List Every Day

Helping humanity, one kindness at a time.
You can help – Please share this with others.